truth and freedom

The summer term is always slightly different along at the primary school.

There are all the Monday holidays, trips and outings, and even election days (there's one coming up on June 4th in case you hadn't noticed!). And as a result it's sometimes a week or two between my visits.

So it was good to be back today. A couple of times.

The assemblies last week had both been called off (something else going on in the halls). But today we were back with a P1-3 assembly.

'Freedom' is the theme this month. The value that the head is keen to teach.

He stressed that the rights we enjoy can only be had when we recognise too the real responsibilities we have as well. Fail to deliver the latter and everyone's rights are affected.

Fairly basic stuff. Freedom isn't anarchy. (He didn't put it like that, of course!)

Being free to do as we like in an absolute sense, being free to do as we feel inclined or as our instincts tell us we must ... well, that just doesn't work. There are - and have to be - constraints.

It isn't the jungle we live in, where it's every one for themselves.

I'm always glad of the chance to sit in there with the children, I have to say. The time for reflection is good.

I was speaking to one of the girls in P2 as both they and I arrived.

"Why do you come to our assembly?" she asked.

"I don't want to miss the fun!" I replied. "And I always want to learn."

Which is true. Most of the time what the head has to say on the theme of the month is a message it's helpful to hear.

I was speaking about truth in yesterday's blog. Today it's freedom.

There's a connection, of course.

Jesus spelled it out. "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples: then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free."

The truth will set you free.

I spend my life teaching the truth. For that reason. Anarchy isn't freedom. Discipleship is.

The SU group were meeting along at the school today again. The usual lunch-time thing.

There weren't that many there, but the three or four who'd come had brought along a friend. A Moslem girl.

The teacher with whom I lead the group was anxious about her being there since she hadn't really asked her parents about coming along. He was ready to turn her away.

I suggested not. We were reading the story of the prophet Elijah. In the Old Testament Scriptures which Islam treats as one of its holy books.

And we weren't really pushing a 'party' line at all. Just reading the Scriptures and learning the lessons it taught.

Elijah was one who was truly 'free'.

But his right to be free from the tyranny Ahab, the king at the time, was imposing was bound up entirely with his gladly submitting to God.

He did what God said. And insisted that others did too, declaring what God had revealed in the Scriptures they long since had had.

It was hard, for sure. A risky way to live his life you might have thought. A costly course to follow day by day.

But the man was free. He did what God said. He lived the life of the kingdom. Discipleship.

And the birds which came and fed him day by day - they too were 'free'. But the birds themselves were following holy orders. God commanded the birds to feed his prophet Elijah. And they did.

"You've a right to be free. But, hey, you birds, you've got a responsibility here as well: go feed my man Elijah!"

They followed the teaching. They 'knew the truth'. And the truth set them free.

Freedom.

It's been an interesting day, when one way and another God's been answering prayer and on all sorts of fronts progressing his purposes here.

It's involved for me a whole load of varied telephone calls, and e-mail correspondence, and trips to the local hospital, and visits to folk at night, and some fairly in-depth discussion about some very pressing issues here.

And bit by bit the way ahead has slowly opened up.

The Lord is on the move, these days.

Much as he was in the days of Elijah as well, perhaps.

And when God's on the move you don't want to get in his way.

You don't want to be a hindrance to the forward march of God. You don't want to step out of line. You don't want to be trying to be doing your own thing.

You march in time or you don't get to go. You get on board or you miss the boat.

"Hold to my teaching .. the truth will set you free."

the issue

I rarely read a newspaper.

Sometimes I'll squint through the sports pages. But mostly I simply don't look at a newspaper from one week's end to another.

Today I remembered why.

I was fed by some folk a couple of lengthy articles that there have been in the recent press. One from The Times and one from yesterday's Scotsman.

Both were directed towards the upcoming General Assembly the Church of Scotland holds in a week or two's time. And both took a similar line, I suppose, though one was more comment, the other a sort of report.

It's the subtle distortions of fact that always end up annoying me so much: and confusing such a lot of the punters.

Here's an example of what I mean. This is The Times online, referring to the case of 'an openly gay minister whose appointment last year to a parish church has caused divisions' -

"The Church of Scotland is due to debate his appointment at its General Assembly next week after a petition was signed by almost a third of ministers pushing for all gays to be banned from the pulpit"

It reads as if the peitition is what has triggered the Assembly debate. Which, of course, is not how it is at all.

It's the other way round. The petition (if that's what you call it - and that's debatable too) has only arisen because the matter is to be debated at the Assembly.

There's a difference. And it's an important one.

Like who really started the stouche? Which 'side', as it were, in the argument was first to step out of line? Who were the ones to break rank?

Let's at least get our facts all right.

And that means seeing that it's simply not true to declare that there's somehow this huge big 'push' "for all gays to be banned from the pulpit".

That's simply not true. A subtle, unhelpful distortion which misses the point entirely. There's no such push and no such wish at all.

That's not what the whole debate is really about.

It misses, for one thing, the vital distinction between sexual orientation and sexual activity.

Morality has little to do with, and little to say on, the former. But it has everything to do with the latter.

The issue is not about a homosexual man at all. It's not about our sexuality so much as about morality. And on what that morality's based.

When I read the piece in The Scotsman, written by a Church of Scotland minister, I thought you could have been forgiven for thinking that the final authority for Christian morality is the UN Declaration of Human Rights, with Articles 1 and 2 being quoted in full.

Have we decided to dispense with the Bible? I thought, as I read the thing. Have I missed a trick along the way?

But no. To be fair to the man, he got on to the Bible next. Although I noted the order.

He quoted the 'Letter of John', exhorting us all to love. (He could have quoted a lot of places along pretty similar lines).

Classic Beatles theology: All you need is love.

And so, getting onto his theme of love, the man waded in -

"If the Church says a gay person cannot be a minister of the gospel....."

Woah! Woah! Same mistake again.

That's not what the church is being asked to declare That's not what the so-called petition is all about. That's not the issue is at all.

And it clearly wasn't a slip of the tongue (or the finger across the keyboard). He was back on exactly that line again later on -

"When a national institution, like the Church, publicly states homosexual people are not good enough to become ministers of Word and Sacrament....."

But no-one is saying that. That's distorting the thing entirely.

In fact that first part of his sentence is so full of distorted, unhelpful thinking, it's hard to know where to start.

Like, he seems to suggest that because we're a 'national institution' we have a responsibility to the nation, as though our values and standards must be drawn from and must in some way reflect the tenor of national life.

Like, he seems to suggest that the church somehow thinks that certainly some people somewhere are 'good enough' to become ministers of the gospel: as though we had some kind of league of Christian piety and the ones at the top get automatic promotion to the premier league of ministry, and the ones who've 'come out' get a massive points deduction.

None of us make the grade. None of us measure up. That's not what the thing is about at all.

And certainly not what he suggests is being said, that "homosexual people are not good enough to become ministers".

No one is good enough.

And no one's suggesting that some folk get banned from this ministry on account of their sexual orientation. It's not about our sexuality at all.

It's about morality. And whence our view of morality is derived.

I know the Beatles sang the song. And I liked it myself, for all that it's a bit repetitive. All you need is love.

I know, as well, that Augustine once said something like "Love God and do what you like". And I know, or at least I vaguely remember, enough church history to know that Augustine was one of the 'goodies', clever, wise, and basically on the button.

But to think that this line somehow settles the thing once for all would have made even poor old Augustine turn in his grave. He said what he did because he knew what Jesus meant when he said "If you love me you will obey my commandments".

And though Jesus certainly welcomed folk, regardless of who they were or what they'd been, that welcome was never a license to do as they pleased.

He let the rich young ruler walk away, after all. It wasn't quite terms and conditions that Jesus laid down. But it wasn't an easy soft option he offered either.

You want to follow me? Then this is what it'll mean.

It's costly. Very costly. And for the rich young man, too costly.

'Morality' always is. 'Ministry' always is. Costly.

Jesus didn't go running back after the man and say he'd shift the God-given goalposts just a bit to make it a whole lot easier for the man.

Despite the fact that he loved the man, we're told.

The issue's not about love so much as truth. And where that truth is found. And how that truth's interpreted.

The newspapers don't really help. You can see why I don't read them much!

storms

The weather is deceptive.

Today, like yesterday, has been bright with clear blue skies. Shirt-sleeve sort of stuff, with not a lot of wind.

But it's not what the 'spiritual' weather's been like at all. Anything but.

There are storms already assailing God's work: and the forecast isn't good.

More storms are on their way. And they're likely to be worse and more ferocious than the present ones.

So a lot of my time through today has been spent in relation to storms. A sort of 'battoning down of the hatches'. Trying to make the place secure as it were, in the face of the buffeting winds.

There have been all the usual tasks, of course.

Doing all the chores in the kitchen to comply with all the rules. Temperature checks, that sort of thing. Getting the first lot of dishes and pans all washed. And making the soups first thing, it being a Tuesday.

Then vacuuming up the whole of the eating area to make the place presentable. We try to ensure that everyone coming in is struck right away by how good the place looks and how warm the whole ethos is.

We have loads of folk coming in most days. And the contact we have is really great.

There's a group of older ladies who come in now for their coffee (the ones who used to meet in a pub 'til the pub kind of turfed them out: purely on economic grounds, I hasten to add!). They love it here.

And they love not least the welcome they receive. I generally try and stop and chat with them for a bit. And I think they like that too.

It's how all good relationships are formed. Those short repeated moments when we get to stop and be with folk and have the chance to talk.

The chat is light at first, of course. Light and full of laughter.

But they're soon aware that we're there for them and so it's sometimes not that long before some greater depths are plumbed.

There was a couple in today like that. They popped in first a few months back. Out of the blue. And liked it a lot. The welcome, the food, the atmosphere, the brightness of the place.

They've been back off and on across the months. And, like it's been with the group of older ladies, they feel very much at home and enjoy the warmth of the fun and the friendship they find.

As I say, it's not been heavy or remotely 'deep' or 'spiritual'. Just good and genuine friendship. And a load of fun as well.

A few months back the man had cancer diagnosed. And a few weeks back the extent of the cancer he has was found to be far worse than what he maybe first had feared.

A matter of weeks to live.

He was touched by the fact that, in at the hospital getting some nasty treatment to ease the pain, he'd received a card from someone here.

And touched as well by the fact that I'd been in to see him there a couple of times myself.

The conversation had shifted gear, of course. No longer simply light. Issues of life and death were now the very centre of his day by day existence. Storms have arrived for him as well.

But he knew he had a friend. And that he could talk.

He's an ill, ill man. But he and his wife chose to come here again for their lunch.

The place and the people afford them a sense of the presence and love of the Lord.

And for folk like that there's nothing they need much more than simply that. Meeting and knowing the Lord.

Being assured of his love and his care, through the obvious care that is shown in the way that this place and the people are treated.

Sensing again there's an order behind all the chaos and turmoil they're facing each day in their lives: the sense that the Lord is in charge, the peace that he alone gives.

The place is an outpost of heaven. At least that's what we see it as being and work day by day to create.

And a day like today when a couple like that come for lunch, I find it very moving. Meeting and finding the Lord in the darkness and mist of the last few weeks of life.

It's the Lord who makes it happen. Sure.

But it doesn't happen magically. We have to work at it all the time.

And the 'storms' that I mentioned right at the start, we have to see in the context of all that the Lord is accomplishing here in our midst.

And maybe as well, beyond and around all the storms is the wind of the Spirit of God. At work in ways which thus far can't be seen or understood.

It makes for some pretty long days. And some long and sleepless nights as well from time to time.

Though I started this just after 10, I was soon on the phone from a man up north who called me at half past ten. He'd been trying to get me a couple of times throughout the early evening.

It was nearly 11 by the time we were done on the phone.

The storms are blowing across the land: the wind of the Spirit of God is stirring again.

bigger

Out and about this afternoon, I saw an interesting 'bumper sticker' on the back window of a car.

"My Dad's bigger than yours!"

It took me aback for a moment or two. I'm naive enough to read these things quite literally.

For a fleeting moment I thought to myself - how can you possibly know? My Dad's been dead for more than a quarter of a century!

In fact, I was so put out for that second or two that I found myself thinking - I bet he's not (I mean, I bet your Dad's not bigger than mine: since my Dad was 6 foot 3 in his stocking soles).

But reality quickly set in. It was, after all, just another playful 'bumper sticker' which meant no harm. As in, 'just joking'.

When I walked on by, I thought about it some more. And the more I thought the more I reflected that this was a word from the Lord. For me. In the face of all that's presently going on.

A reminder to me of certain basic truths I need to cling to day by day.

My Dad's bigger than yours.

That's the truth nof the matter so far as I'm concerned.

My Dad is God. And you don't get bigger than that.

And I'm having to learn all over again to depend on that basic truth.

In a strange sort of way it was Jesus who really coined, if not the phrase, then certainly the notion.

He reckoned that those who were his opponents were 'of their father the devil'.

Quite harsh, the language he used! But he made people sit up, take notice of what he was saying: and think.

And when he got nailed to that wicked cross he was all too aware, I suppose, that this was what he who's the father of lies could come up with and throw in his face.

Deception leads to destruction.

The folk who opposed him - their 'Dad' had quite an armoury, and, bully that he is, is pretty strong.

But ...

My Dad's bigger than yours.

It was like today the Lord was simply reminding me once again that that's the bottom line.

Hitting me right in the face with this fact as I walked along and telling me simply - remember!

These days aren't all that easy, that's for sure. In all sorts of ways which I can't go into here.

So it's good to have this perspective underlined for me and brought to my attention once again.

It forms the solid backdrop, or bedrock, to all that I've been doing.

Which on a Monday involves a fair old bit of preparation. With the Wednesday lunchtime service coming up and soe thought to be given to each of the two Sunday services.

And then, again, there have been people to see and visits to make and a meeting at night to consider some aspects of our whole overall 'youth strategy'.

Where there's work to be done.

Sometimes it feels like it's failure on every front. Like the challenge is way too big. Like we're not really up to the task. Like the thing's getting worse as time goes on.

It's then that I have to remember that rock bottom truth on which my life is built -

My Dad's bigger than yours.

dark

Faith, someone said, means seeing in the dark.

I'm not really sure I agree.

I suspect faith means clinging on to a semblance of hope when it's dark all around and you don't see a thing at all. When little makes sense and all that you can see (even in the dark) suggests that things are bad.

The bright spot today was the service we hold here at lunchtime.

There are still a good lot of folk who come out to this time and who seem to enjoy the simple act of worship which there is. And the lunch afterwards, as well, of course. Maybe that a bit more!

A lot of them are getting on in years, and not what once they were.

I sat at lunch with a lady who's now pretty blind. I guess for her the world is always dark. And she doesn't see much at all.

She used to do loads. Now she only does a guided tour of a National Trust property here in town. Even most of that, I imagine, is done pretty much from memory, so poor is her sight.

Outwardly at least, she doesn't seem to let it get her down. She just gets on with things.

She's doing an Alpha course, for one thing, as part of a group of older folk who are getting to know the Lord.

Life may be fairly dark for her, both in fact and by way of metaphor. And there's not that much she sees. But her outlook is hopeful and always so very positive.

A further rebuke and challenge, I guess, to folk like me.

high noon

It's not often that I end up 'double booked'. But I was today!

Rather embarassing - and I'm still not sure exactly how it happened. Other than the fact that just occasionally, for reasons best known to itself, my computer kind of 'loses' an entry in the diary section. Which obviously left a space I proceeded to fill.

The whole long morning, in fact, was pretty much filled with people I'd fixed to see.

The 'double booked' folk were very good about it all.

One of them was my 'chaplain' whom I see from time to time. She understood. As you'd expect.

Normally I have about an hour with her. Today it was a much briefer stint.

But enough for me to chat through with her the issues on my heart.

Sometimes there isn't that much for me to be sharing with her. No major problems I'm having to face. Sometimes there are such issues though. And today was one of those times.

I've been grappling for quite some while with a couple of vexing issues. Trying to get clear in my head what the Lord is saying in all of the thing and what he is trying to do.

There's now a degree of urgency over it all. So today I've been working away at that, spending time as well trying to gain a bit of clarity.

The clarity came. Quite pointedly in fact.

Mainly as I gave myself to preparing for tomorrow's lunch time service. The Lord seemed to make things all clear through the passage I worked to prepare.

It's about the brothers of Joseph preparing to meet with the man (though they don't know it's him). And they're due to meet him at noon.

A kind of 'High Noon' encounter.

They happen from time to time. And our 'High Noon' is approaching fast.

So the passage, I saw, is really pretty relevant.

Present your prayers. That was the first simple lesson he underlined. Bring the matter to me. Pray about it, and trust that I, the sovereign Lord, will indeed work the whole thing out in ways far better than you fear.

Well, I figured we've been doing that for a while. And it was just like the Lord said, 'Trust me on this one'. I will and I do.

Step number two. Pre-empt all the problems. Be entirely up front and don't try to duck all the issues. That only really complicates things.

Well, again, we've been seeking to do just that for a while. It's hard to think how we could have done anything more in that regard.

Then, thirdly, ponder God's kind providences. There were strange and timely happenings which must have made the brothers wonder what on earth was going on.

And there has been with us a strange and timely providence as well. I can't really say just what that is. But take it from me, it's a very timely providence.

And it's like the Lord was saying in advance - I've got things all in place. Trust me to see this through and sort this out and see it all resolved in ways far better than you'd ever thought were possible.

So I found that pretty re-assuring!

The Lord lets us know what to pray. He shares his heart.

I've still got to battle anxiety until it's all resolved. But this sort of thing from the Lord sets my heart at rest.

He works in wonderful ways. That's for sure.

There's a person who's started to come around us here these past few weeks. I was seeing her here tonight. (Another sort of 'double booking' since I had to skip the second part of a meeting I was at as well).

It's been, I suppose, a sort of 'coming home' after years and years 'on the road'.

She was up at the doctors' here a few weeks back and passed the church and thought she must come in. Which she did, the Sunday following.

Except she arrived as people were leaving (she got the time wrong - the last place she worshipped a long while back the service began at 11.30am).

The fact that there were so many folk and they all seemed to chat with each other - that warmed her heart and made her more eager still to be part of it all.

Which she's been these past few weeks.

She's in touch with friends in the army. Out in Iraq and Afghanistan.

She told them all she's started attending the church. And they've asked her to pray.

And they've started to worship on Sundays as well out there. There's a kind of amazing knock on effect!

And all of a sudden the Lord simply moves things along at the rate of knots.

Who knows where it all will end? We only know it'll be good when it finally does!

holding hands

"If someone will hold my hand, I'll go through anything!"

That's what someone said to me this afternoon.

Don't get me wrong - she wasn't making advances on me or anything. At least, I don't think so.

She's in hospital. And she's facing a difficult day tomorrow.

But she knew the challenges had to be faced. And was stating her basic premise.

As long as I don't have to face it alone, I'll be OK.

Which is pretty much what we're all about in our work for the Lord. Enabling folk to see and to feel that they're not alone.

It's the message I'm called to share.

So there's always a fair bit of solid preparing to do. Getting my head round just what it is the Lord means me to be teaching the folk.

And there are always people to see. Mostly folk who are facing particular challenges. And who need, as it were, someone to 'hold their hand'.

So as well as preaching the message, I have to live it too. I have to learn to be there for them too.

Present at their side.

Re-assuring, comforting and strengthening.

Guiding, leading, directing, 'til they're able to see the way forward for themselves.

And all the time, the Lord himself is there.

Taking me by the hand and leading me always on.

In the face of the challenges I have to cope with as well.

Which aren't exactly small.