time flies

There was word this morning of another death.

Another elderly woman, a member of our fellowship here. Another couple who'd been married for over 60 years. And another man, way up in his 90s left bereaved.

Strange how the two, so similar in many ways, have followed each other so closely.

I was up to see this latest man to be bereaved this afternoon. It always takes time. But a man like that, well up in his nineties ... well, everything is slow.

It takes time to walk to his room. Time to get him seated. Time to tell me what's happened. Time to try and digest it all. Time to be still in the presence of God and pray. And time to walk him back to the common sitting room. (He's in a nursing home these days).

The pace of life has slowed by the time you reach that age. And maybe that's no bad thing.

We'd put on an evening for all of the fellowship here to enjoy tonight. A chance to learn what's going on. A chance to have their questions raised and aired. A chance for all to have their say and voice the sort of issues which they felt we have to face.

There was a man there, a busy, high-flying business-man, and there he was, at half-past eight at night by the time I got to be speaking with him, and he still had 140 unopened e-mails that he'd have to answer that night. All on his little portable office (blackberry!) which means he's never away from his work.

That's a different pace of life entirely!

But it's his work, his vocation, the sphere in which he knows that he's been placed by God. And so he just gets on with it. He's fit, he's able, and he wants to make a difference in the way he lives his life and uses all his gifts - he wants to make a difference for the kingdom of God.

There isn't much time for anything else, once he's been back home and spent some time (what time's left over) with the family. Sometimes he simply works on through the night 'til 6am or so to get it done.

My life's not like that! Thankfully.

It's somewhere between the two, nearer this high-flying man than the 90 year old, for sure. But again, that's my choice. My vocation. What I'm called by God to be and do. And therefore what I'm glad to do and what I find he always helps me do.

Finding our vocation at any given stage in life. I guess that's pretty basic. What happens if you're meant to be doing, or trying to do, something for which you're not fitted? It simply doesn't work. And everyone suffers.

That's why teaching's very much a vocation. You simply couldn't do it unless you had, as it were, 'the call'.

I'm often aware of that when I'm out and along at the school and I see what the teachers there all have to do. If it isn't 'you', if it isn't your vocation, the work for which you've been made and 'called' to do, then it must be just a nightmare.

And everyone surely suffers. The teacher, the pupils, the rest of the staff.

It's basic square-peg-in-a-round-hole sort of stuff.

Anyway, vocation. We were back to the study of Joseph at the lunchtime service today. And there was a man with a clear and God-given sense of vocation. Just a pity he didn;t quite know how to handle it in his early years and used it as a weapon in his private sort of battle with his brothers.

Some of my morning was spent preparing for that. The rest of the time was used up in preparing the service of thanksgiving I'm leading tomorrow, since tomorrow itself won't give me a moment to do it.

I generally meet with one of the leaders here on a Wednesday after lunch. Touching base, catching up, thinking ahead, and having some time to pray.

Not as long today as it sometimes is, since there's quite a lot going on. But we both need prayer. For wisdom and grace. Sometimes there are issues where no good way ahead seems possible at all. What do you do then?

That's where we need the God-given grace of his wisdom, the sort of wisdom only he, by his Spirit, can give. And boldness, too. Because sometimes issues can't be ducked, or postponed: but have to be met head on.

And the calling of leaders, then, is to get it right. Acting justly, loving mercy, walking humbly with our God. The three solid legs on which leadership especially always has to stand.

There was the meeting at night to prepare for as well. And with the afternoon rapidly marching on, and my visit to see this 90 year old man still to come, there wasn't that long to prepare.

I'd have liked more time. But wouldn't we all?! Time flies: but I get to be the pilot.

The evening itself went well. It's the first such time we've held. So there are things to learn. But it was good to have some sort of forum where a range of folk could feed in their concerns and cares and questions and could contribute their thinking to the spectrum of our life.

And it was great having something like 70 people joining in prayer at the end, in smaller groups.

The man who'd still got the hundred and forty e-mails to open and read and reply had come home and said, despite all the pressures of work, what a great day it had actually been. He thrives on all the pressure that there is.

And I guess that I do, too.

Not least because amidst the countless different things I get to do, I'm just so very conscious of the Lord himself being very much at work.

I find that a massive privilege. And hugely exciting as well!